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I want the funky chicken.

Age 37, Male

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some boring ass school

New York,NY

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Final Plan!

Posted by Idiot-Finder - August 24th, 2011


Some one tried to dump a bucket of liquid on my, thankfully the aiming was bad as it spilled several steps in front of me. I looked up and saw someone freaking out and ran back into the apartment window, that's when I notice the liquid smelled funny. Now I know the "surprise" Dillon was referring to on that letter he wrote, to tell you the truth I was taken by surprise...who the hell would try pour a bucket of piss onto someone's head? Not to mention that he missed.

See what happened, I ran into the apartment and up the stairs to find the sick freak. Remembering the floor and the window, I ran up to the fourth floor and stopped to think about which apartment room he's hiding in. But then a moment later I could hear a door opening and saw the piss dumper walking by...

"You!" I yelled.

He turned and his face went pale.

"H-hey...look it's a joke okay, just a funny prank...I don't mean a-any harm..." he stammered.

He took off and I ran after him.

After chasing him around the hall, he ran into an open door and slams it shut. Before he was able to lock the door, I kicked it open and the kid started to scamper to whatever he could find to defend himself. Then the door slams shut right behind me and out of nowhere all his friends jumped out.

"We got you now!" the kid laughed.

After a moment I slapped myself in the forehead and said, "Oh now I get it, surprise! This is the surprise, not that bucket of piss,"

"Too late!" said one of his friends.

Then they start spraying me with crazy strings...yeah, that's how they "attacked" me.

"Oh, don't feel bad just because you're covered with crazy strings," one said in a mocking tone.

"Now that we have humiliated you, you won't be able to show your face in the public again!" said the other.

"Really? That's it?" I asked.

But then again had their weapons haven't been confiscated by the raid, it would have been ugly I guess. I quickly forgot about the fact that I was angry at the idiot for trying to dump a bucket of excrement on me and laughed. I had been in a random mood lately, with all the things going on it gets really unpredictable so in the end what those guys did actually helped loosen me up. The imbeciles were confused and looked at me like I went crazy or something.

"Hey, what's the matter with you?"

"Yeah, have you gone mad?"

I removed the crazy strings and said, "Good one guys, this is hilarious!"

"Wait a minute, you're supposed to be crying not laughing!"

"Can't believe this, he's enjoying it!"

"I give up!"

Then there's some more conversation but I forgot the rest so...

After I left, I decided to go to Victor's to see if something happened and that he might know. While on my way, the Chargers fan from the night before shows up brandishing a glow stick and said, "You're not punking out on me are ya? I'm going to give you a reason to punk out once I'm done with ya!"

"What's with the glow stick?" I asked.

"I heard it's a weapon that can kill Giants fans because it's their greatest weakness, I'm going to try it out!"

"That's Red Sox fans you fucking idjit."

He went ahead and start whacking me in the head with a glow stick, but then I punched him in the face and he starts bleeding out of his nose.

"Oh gawd...my noze...youse asswhole...how dare yoo..." he screamed while covering his face.

I grabbed his head and start slamming my head on it repeatedly until I started to feel dizzy.

"You may have won for now, next time...!"

Then he took off.

Feeling tired, I returned to the inn and took a rest for few days, I was lazy so it's almost a week since that time. Remembering what I was going to do before slacking off, I went to Victor's home and notice the door was ajar. I entered and in the living room there are some signs of struggle, granted nothing's damaged but there's a bit of a mess here and there along with some cereal being spilled, what a waste of food.

There's a note on the floor and it reads:

Dear Andrew Lau,

While our attempt to humiliate you didn't work out and more of our members have dropped out, the rest of us decided to take matters further. Your friend Victor is now under our captivity, you better show up at the warehouse unarmed.

If you don't, I hope you won't mind your friend ends up with a throat slit!

I tore up the letter and start cursing at myself knowing that if I hadn't took several days off, this wouldn't have happened. However since the letter didn't say when I should show up, I decided to abuse the loophole and hoped that I'm not too late. So later that night, I approach the warehouse and saw couple of teenagers guarding the entrance of the building. While the guards weren't looking, I sprinted to the side of the building and hid behind the corner.

I listened to their conversation...

"Eric, do you think it would work? There's only four of us left and two are inside making sure Victor won't escape!"

"Yes it will work, James Dillon knows what he's doing there's no way he'll fuck it up, he's our god after all!"

"I guess you're right, he did told us that he communicated with the spirits of Harris and Kleboid, they chose him for a reason to carry on their legacy."

I wondered if they're really that retarded...

Carefully I waited until one of the went into the building for some reason, probably to discuss something with Dillon. I crept right behind the remaining guard, armed with a steering wheel lock I found right outside of the junk shop few weeks ago, I whacked him in the head to knock him out cold.

"Hey what's that noise?" someone yelled.

I ran back to hide behind the corner.

"Oh my god! Clay...wake up...wake up!" his friend yelled.

After a moment of a pause, I took a peek and saw another teenager placing his fingers on his arm.

"He's alive, someone knocked him out." he said.

"Could it be?" asked Eric.

"I think so, he did came...we'll need to be prepared!"

"You bastard, come out!"

I waited for a while and then...

"Eric, calm down, doing this won't make him out, we'll need to lure him in!" said the teenager.

"You're right, there's no way he'll abandon his friend, time to bring out Victor and hopefully he'll cooperate or otherwise...he's dead!" said Eric.

Angry, I came up to Eric from behind and whack him in the head with a steering wheel lock, knocking him unconscious.

"You you finally showed yourself, come on in Mr. Lau!" said the teenager.

I followed him and saw Victor tied up on a chair with a gag on his mouth.

Truth to be told, it looked a bit gay...

Jame Dillon shows up and said, "So Andrew, the time has come!"

"Let Victor go, he had nothing to do with this for the past month!" I said.

"I know, but seeing your face as I'm ready to kill your friend will be...enjoyable!" said Dillon as he begins to smile.

He pulled out a knife and started to head toward Victor as the teenager restrained me from behind, causing me to drop my weapon. I elbowed him several times, causing him to let go and I finished him off with a kick to the face. Afterward I picked up the steering wheel lock and seeing that I won't get to where Dillon's heading to in time, I punt the object and hits James Dillon's hand, knocking the knife off his hand.

"My hand...you son of a bitch!" he yelled and took off.

I was ready to chase him when the unnamed teenager got up and stood in my way.

After several punches to his face, I ran after Dillon but by the time I did so, he's nowhere to be found.


Comments

Yeah it looked totally gay.

I know, they might have done something to him as far as I'm concerned. They did used chloroform on him so we can all guess what happened.