This afternoon at the park, I was walking by when I saw an egg roll on the ground right in front of a tree. I looked up and saw a poorly made cage hanging up supported by a rope that leads to a bush right next to the tree. After hearing someone sneezing from behind the bush, I shook my head and wonder if they're actually serious, not to mention what they were doing is racist.

I decided to wait for a bit just to see if someone came and pick it up.

A dog came and started to eat the egg roll when the idiot behind the bush let go the rope and drops the cage.

"I got him! I got hi-oh fuck!"

The dog growled and a second later you can guess what happened.

His friends ran off and abandoned him while I stood there wondering if I should help him.

"He had it coming anyway," I said to myself and left.

The next day I heard the kid is in the hospital with stable condition so he'll be okay. But then things gets weirder from here...

Someone dug a hole hole on a lawn in a neighborhood and covered it up with some branches and leaves. I don't know if there's anyone gullible to fall for this but I could tell the person to dug this isn't from this neighborhood, because when an old guy came out of the house, he saw the covered hole and start cursing. Guess these idiots should learn that one must never piss off an old guy by messing up his lawn, do that and you're dead.

I was curious to see if anyone of those idiots would come back to see if the trap worked so I went to the arcades to kill some time knowing it'll be awhile. Besides, if I stay there and wait, the old man would think it's me. After a bout with Pac man and Metal Slug, it's starting to get late and I returned to the neighborhood to see if something happened, surprisingly someone did fell but unsurprisingly, I heard someone screaming for help and I recognize the voice, it's one of the other idiots who tried to trap me a day before. The old guy's at home and judging by the look from the window, he's calling the police about a vandal (also helped that he was yelling and the window's open) who messed up his lawn.

You know, I was expecting to see the old man blowing the dude's head clean off with a shotgun, guess he calmed down.

I started to walk back to the motel when some dude on a bicycle came and stopped right in front of me.

"Hey, what's the big deal?" I said.

"I knew you'd be here, but didn't expect you not to fall into the trap...that fucking moron messed it up!" the bicyclist growled.

"I seriously doubt the trap would fool anyone expect for you guys, so I'm guessing there's a message for me from you guys right?"

"Yes."

He handed me a letter and rode off.

I open up the envelope and begin the read, it says:

To whom it may concern,

Andrew Lau, for sometime you have been a bane of our existence.

Ever since you joined our alliance, you have been sabotaging our efforts to seek revenge against those who have tormented us and even demeaned our reputation.

"As if they even had one from the start."

Before I continue to read the letter, I went to the lamp post and proceed.

We may not have as much members as we used to thanks to you and that traitor Victor, if only his cousin with the same name were here our alliance would have been much better. But the point is that you have mocked us and humiliated us and this is unforgivable. Now that you called the cops on us, all our weapons are gone so our previous plan have been put on hold...until we succeed in our next mission which is to kill you disgusting stinky poo poo head!

"What the?"

Ha ha ha!

How does it feel? I bet it hurts didn't ya?

Burned bitch! You got pwned!

There's more where that comes from but don't worry, we won't kill you and we won't attack you now or it won't be much fun.

We'll plan something big tomorrow and it will target you, we won't tell 'cuz it's a surprise...

MUWAHAHAHAHA!

Scared now aren't you? Well you should be because we will humiliate you like you have humiliated me!

I bet you're pissing yourself right now huh babby, cry for your mommy you ca ca brain!

"I think my brain cells are dying..."

I turn the letter over to read the rest of the message on the back.

We will own you faggot so die!

I hate you yellow man, go back to China!

I will kick your butt!

That's all!

Sincerely, James Dillon.

P.S: You suck!

The last part of the message was ad-nauseating, I mean is this guy really serious? Maybe I shouldn't have call the cops on them because those idiots would have hurt themselves instead of anyone in the school.

I looked up into the sky and could barely see stars due to light pollution. I wished that I could see the stars for once, I always wanted to see if the could spot Polaris so that way I can know if it's possible to use it as a guide.

Anyway, I decided to head back when someone came right in front of me and placed his hands on his hips.

"What now?" I groaned.

"It's been a while you filthy Giants fan..." he said.

"Wait a minute...do I know you?"

I tried to recall who this guy is to no avail.

"Very funny," he said.

He takes out a knife and continued, "I have been waiting for this day, what you did in San Diego will never be forgiven!"

Then it hits me!

"Wait a minute, it rings a bell...where have you been?" I said.

"Few months ago you said that you beat up a mime who took over a village in New Zealand so I went there to see for myself," he said.

I took out a small bad of popcorn and continued to listen.

"But then when I got there, I remember that you said that the village was somewhere near Auckland but I don't know exactly where so when I tried to find the place...I got lost for a while," he continued.

"Really? For how long?" I asked.

"Didn't keep track so I don't know, ended up in a jungle and got attacked by monkeys..."

While listening to his story, I took out a can of Pepsi and said, "What happened after that?"

"I blacked out for a while...I think they gang-raped me...it's still sore..." he said.

After stopping for few minutes, the Chargers fan then proceed to carry on with his story about his journey in New Zealand.

"After countless days and nights and nights and days...I finally rediscover the civilization back in Auckland, I was going to give up searching for that village you told me about because you never told me the exact direction!" he yelled.

"Hey don't blame me, I stumbled into the village after wandering around, except it took me few hours and it wasn't that far from the city, not to mention I didn't even need to wander into the jungle to get attacked by monkeys like an idiot you are!" I said.

After ticking him off for a bit, the Chargers fan then said, "I asked around in the city about the village and the evil mime but everyone looked at me like I'm on drugs but one day...I finally struck gold!"

"Really?" I said.

"Yeah, I ran into one of the villagers who happens to be in the city and he took me there, even told me about the evil mime and how he was defeated!"

"See? Told you I'm not lying!"

"But then what I saw was disgusting, you're a hero in this village and whenever I talked bad about you, they tried to kill me!" he growled.

"Serves you right!" I laughed.

"You're beneath me!" he yelled.

"I crapped bigger than you!" I said.

He tried to punch me but I grabbed his arm and flipped him over.

"What the...what did you do?" he screamed.

"Saw it on T.V., it looked cool so I practiced for a bit," I yawned.

Then I continued, "It's getting late, if you want to continue let's do this tomorrow."

The Chargers fan got up and said, "Okay, we'll fight tomorrow and this time I will kick your ass!"

Then he ran off.