I'm planning on staying for few days, just to let you know, it's getting crazy out here. Yesterday while blowing the cash I won from that Charger fan on slots, I could have swore that machine is acting on it's own. Come to think of it, I think it's laughing at me...

"You piece of crap!" I yelled

I start attacking it until the thing breaks and the coins starts pouring out. Yeah, I got kicked out but was allowed to keep the money. Then while outside a Charger fan from before came out of nowhere and confront me...again!

"What now?" I said

"You think it's over? Think again!" he said

"So you survived, whoop-dee-doo, what's next?"

"I'll will kill you no matter what it takes!"

"Just give it up, don't forget your Chargers won, you should be satisfied"

"I can't get no satisfaction!"

"What?"

Then suddenly a music starts playing...

When I'm drivin' in my car
and a man comes on the radio
he's tellin' me more and more
about some useless information
supposed to fire my imagination.
I can't get no, oh no no no.
Hey hey hey, that's what I say.

I can't get no satisfaction,
I can't get no satisfaction.
'Cause I try and I try and I try and I try.
I can't get no, I can't get no.

"Want to know what you need?" I said

"What?"

"Mary Jane, drugs are bad but MJ can shut you up!"

"That's right!" a hippie yells

Then he proceeds to sing...

I'm in love with Mary Jane.
She's my main thing.
She makes me feel alright.
She makes my heart sing.

Then I took over...

And when I'm feeling low,
She comes as no surprise.
Turns me on with her love.
Takes me to paradise.

Do you love me Mary Jane?
Yeah. Whoa-oh-oh.
Do ya? Do ya? Do ya?
Now do you think you love me Mary Jane.
Don't you play no games.

Then almost everyone joins in and it gets ridiculous afterwards...

After the crowd did the chorus

I love her just the same.
I love her, Mary baby, just the same.
The woman plays no games.
Now, now, now.

I'm in love with Mary Jane.
I'm not the only one.
If Mary wanna play around,
I let her have her fun.
She's not the kind of girl
that you can just tie down.
She likes to spread her love
and turn your head around.

After couple of choruses...

Yeahhhhh! Ooowoooo.
Oh baby. Oh baby. Hit me.
Whoah, Mary. Only love.
I love you, yeah. Whooo!
Something until we give it now, lovey-dove.
Uh-huh. Wow, baby!
Sing! La-du-da-da-du-da-dahh.
Sing! La-du-da-da-du-da-dahh.
Sing it for me baby.
Come Mary, Mary Jane.
Sing it for me baby

After the song is finished, a Charger fan then tires to hit me with a chair, but I wrestle it away from him. Then I knocked him down and body slammed him before tossing him into a dumpster, he got out afterwards.

"Yeah, so what my Chargers won? At least your Giants won a Super Bowl, three!" he screamed

"The game your Chargers won, the defense gift-wrapped it for them so you should be happy" I said

"So what? How many championships my Chargers won? NONE!!!"

"Didn't they won a AFL championship once?"

"THAT DIDN'T COUNT!!! ALSO YOU'RE WEARING A YANKEE CHAMPIONSHIP ROSTER TEE, WE HAVE NOTHING!!!"

"Jeez, calm down, your screaming's hurting my ears"

Then he begins to start crying...

"Not only that...ever since you laughed at me when my girlfriend left me over a year ago, my life haven't been the same, my friends are gone because you called FBI on them, I also lost my job..."

Then someone said "They took his jerb"

"All because I laughed at you" I said sarcastically

"YES, MY LIFE IS DESTROYED AND MY BROTHERS WASTED THEIRS TRYING TO AVENGE ME AND I HAD TO POSSESS THIS IDIOT'S BODY TO..."

"You are an idiot, you know that? You could have just move on but instead you decide to waste your life away like a stupid lowlife"

Then I continued,

"Also you start ripping out ideas from mangas to try to kill me and next thing you know, you'll start doing what Jigsaw did in that crappy movie series"

Then the Charger fan begins to calm down...

Then Tony Bennett shows up and starts singing...

It seems today, that all you see, is violence in movies and sex on TV
But where all those good 'ol fashioned values
On which we used to rely?

Lucky there's a family guy
The one man on this earth who makes do everything like

Effin' cry!

He a family Guuuuuuy!

"Irony"

Then Vince McMahon shows up clapping and said "This is by far the greatest wrestling performance I have ever seen!"

He starts shaking hands with a Charger fan who then said "Really?"

"Yes, how would you like to join WWE? We'll get you a contract soon enough"

Then McMahon turns to me and said "No offense, you're a decent wrestler but you lacked the raw talent this guy has"

Then they left, I shrugged and went back to my hotel room.

"At least things couldn't get any worse" I said to myself

After turning on a television...

ESPN NEWS!!! Hey Giants fans, feeling down? Time to make you feel even worse! Linebacker Antonio Pierce will be out indefinitely due to neck injury...