After my vehicle broke down few days ago, I have to walk several miles with my AK-47, pistol, and a bandolier of grenades. I'm all out of food and the wireless laptop's power finally gave out, the map is useless so for a moment I thought I'm screwed when I saw a camp nearby after wandering in a desert. When I came upon a camp, to my surprise it's actually where the warlord camps out along with his troops. Not only that, it's the one I was looking for ever since what happened last summer.

This time I will end this!

As I snuck into the campsite, I quickly subdue one of the militant walking by and took the ammos to reload my weapons. Afterwards I look around and made sure nobody's around before I move around to find that warlord when I accidently knocked over a cage filled with doves. Remembering the scenes from John Woo films, I knew doves flying around are bad omen. Soon shots are heard and I have to duck down to avoid getting hit.

"Stupid doves" I said

I quickly dove to the other side behind the supplies and start firing away at the militants with my AK-47, even hitting the explosives. Soon the militants/terrorists were running around yelling in a language I don't understand (foreign languange is never my strong suit aside from english)

Figuring it's safe enough to come out, I went to took for the warlord while making sure no one's behind me in all this confusing chaos. I eventually did found the warlord and I was ready to shoot him when that world's most overrated assault rifle decides to get jammed, the bastard noticed so I threw the assault rifle away, took out my pistol and quickly took him hostage (pussy thing to do I know).

"Stay back! If you don't I'll shoot him" I said despite the militants probably don't know what I'm saying but they understand

Then the warlord shout something and his men were ready to fire, I pushed him toward them and quickly ran to hide

This isn't good at all...

Then I remember I still have a band of grenades

"How did I forget about those?" I said

Then I came up, pull out a pin from a grenade and punts it at the militants along with the warlord...

"AAAAGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!"

There's a explosion and they got blown up, kids there's a lesson to be learned, in a battle always stay away from tanks of fuel.

But it wasn't over yet, the remaining militants are looking for me so I have to stay until I take them down

As I was fighting them off, I saw a viper (villian from the G.I. Joes who killed some of the characters, he was believed to be dead when Snake Eyes pwned him), apparently he was brought back to life as I saw cybernetic parts on him. So I have to hide again and then the gunfight stops for a moment so the viper can call me out

"Give it up you coward! There's no way you can escape now, do what I say and I'll end it quick!"

What he didn't know is that I have no intention to surrender to that prick who mudered several Joe characters including the black guy (although he wasn't responsible for death of Breaker whom happens to be my favorite character)

Then I remember a scene from a John Woo film called "The Killer", I took out a small round of shells and toss it right at them

"What the..."

Before one of them pick it up, I fire at it with another AK-47 I picked up from a dead militant and something amazing happens

The former viper of the Cobra Commander screams "Fu--"

Amid the carnage, I came up to the viper's body and shoved a grenade up as ass (Got the idea from www.stickdeath.com)

"This one's for Doc!" I said before diving away to avoid the explosion

Just to clear things up a bit, the reason why I didn't use kamehameha is because the camp is near the Ethopian/Somali border, so I figure the Ethopian troops might arrive sooner or later. Arrive they did and after few days of questioning in which I told them I was on vacation and was kidnapped, they let me go and I'm due back to the United States. Before that I went back to Somaliland to pack up my stuff and went on a flight to Canada which is where I'm at right now, the transfer will take place in five minutes from now so I gotta make it quick. The transfer fight will take me to Boston after several hours of delay where...wait...a...minute...Boston?