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I want the funky chicken.

Age 36, Male

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some boring ass school

New York,NY

Joined on 8/29/02

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Even More Idiotic Plan!

Posted by Idiot-Finder - January 25th, 2011


After going back to high school after the weekends, I saw that jock from before getting picked on. To those who don't remember what happened, we had a fight after class with everyone watching. The fight only lasted long as it did because I was busy toying with him, he never had a chance from the start. In the end, the jock ends up on the receiving end of a curb stomp battle, it's no contest and he lost every single credibility since then. You know, I don't feel bad for him even if he is getting his lunch money taken buy a chess club member. Guess the nerds finally have someone to pick on, making them feel superior for once.

After he got up from being shoved to the locker by a computer nerd who resembles Bill Gates, he saw me and fled.

"What a loser," I said

Anyway to avoid getting caught since the teachers would have know that I'm not in this school. I went to the cafeteria where I practically kill some time. I didn't eat anything due to my previous experiences with school lunches, it's pretty disgusting. The funny thing is that I saw that same jock sitting alone because whenever he tried to sit on the same table as his teammates and even outcasts, they got up and left. Now that's something what the Hindus called "Karma", no need to feel bad for that guy, especially after my powerful victory.

Once the school ends, I went out to the warehouse where the losers are having a meeting discussing a plan to get back at the bullies. After the event that have occurred the last time they planned something, I knew whatever they're planning will fail. Seriously, it's already pretty much a given considering how bad it was. No wonder why they're outcasts, they're idiots and I thought nerds are supposed to be smart. Guess I found something that breaks the stereotypes when it comes to these kind of people.

The leader came with two other teenagers carrying a massive object covered with a huge veil and said "Okay, while our first plan have failed, I have come up with 'Plan B' which should but the bullies to shame, behold!"

He took off the veil to reveal a giant sling shot!

I was drinking coke when it happened and spat some onto the guy right in front of me.

"Anyway, what we need is a projectile which can be used to knock those assholes out cold, who wants to volunteer?"

The guy next to me got up and said, "I'll do it!"

Everyone cheered while I sat there wondering how bad this one will turn out. Some time later we were outside with a giant slingshot looking for someone to target when my sorta friend from before spotted one of the bullies with his binoculars and said "There's one, let's attack him while the chance is still good!"

"I agree!" said the guy next to him

The sling shot was then positioned as the volunteer puts on a helmet and bicycle gears in order to give him some form of protection. Soon the band is pulled with the volunteer being pulled backwards until his friends decided that it's far enough.

"Ready?"

"Yes I'm ready!"

"Fire!"

His friends then let go on him and soon enough the moron was fired across the street and hits the jock!

Amazed, I said "Whoa, it actually worked!"

"Yeah I know right?" said my friend

But unfortunately, both the idiot and the target ends up with bodily injuries and were send to the hospital.

After it was over, most of the idiots went home while the leader said "Our next plan will turn out better, I guarantee it!"

An hour later, while on my way back to the hotel when I encounter my old enemy...

"Well, well, well...we meet again Dennis!" he said

"Wait a minute, how the hell did you know my name?" I said

Then he became angry and said, "Stop playing dumb! Us Chargers fans have known who you are, I'm sick and tired of you belittling us!"

I sighed and said, "Maybe if you can just stop trying to kill me for the past two fucking years, I would have left you alone, there's a thing called self-defense bud!"

"Fuck you, this time it'll be different, vengeance will be mine!"

"Where have I heard that one before?"

"Mock me while you can, this time I will kill you!"

"It's been over two years already and you never won, you'll never win, and more importantly...the whole thing will turn out the same, just give it up!"

"I won't, not until I finally kill you!"

He takes out a switch blade and tries to attack but I kicked it out of his hand. Soon I proceed to kick him right across the street. Angered, he then got up and tries to charge toward me but didn't notice an uncovered man hole and fell in.

"I'll get you next time!" he screams


Comments

Good on ya son!

How you told me I was so reckless

I never read your stories

Man these guys are fucking desperate.